It is almost 1:30 in the morning and I am sitting in bed listening to the sound of my husband's cpap machine whirl and his steady breathing as he quietly slumbers, I am thinking and reflecting on all that has happened this past year.
Today is the last day of the year and I am ready to put 2016 to bed and usher in a new year. A year that I hope and pray is filled with love, promises and beautiful things and memories galore!
2016 has been a shit storm year and one I pray will NEVER repeat itself. I have been knocked down to my knees and am slowly climbing my way back up out of the pit I was thrown into just 16 short weeks ago. While I can't say what knocked me down, I can say that God hasn't left me nor forsaken me. He has a reason for every storm I weather. I know I will come out stronger and better, but I really wonder how much He thinks I can handle?!?!
One quote I really cling to is this:
"Sometimes God breaks us to make us better"
My favorite scripture passage I cling to:
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight" Proverbs 3:5-6
Learning to TRUST the Lord is hard for me. Learning to SURRENDER my will is hard as well. I can trust and surrender but when things don't start moving and changing in my time frame, I pick it back up and try to do it all my own way and in my own time. BUT....my ways are not God's ways and my timing is not God's timing. I must remember that His ways and His timing are PERFECT!!!!
So as I say goodbye to 2016, I am going to say goodbye (or give it my best shot each and everyday) to doing things my way. I am going to (try) TRUST more and SURRENDER daily my own will. I am going to take it one day at a time, wake up with a positive, can do attitude, and not let the past or the actions of others stop me from being the best me I can be each and every day!
While 2016 hasn't been the best year, it has had some good memories in it. My husband turned the BIG 4-0 this year!! We celebrated with a party at our house with our family and closest friends! We had quite a few fishing trips this past summer! My oldest child became a legal "drinker", I seriously can't be old enough to have a 21 year old, can I?!?! 😳 My girls and I had a weekend trip to the cities for a dance competition in February, it was once again memorable. I will be sad when this season of life is over and my youngest is no longer in dance. I got to spend a weekend in April with my sister and two daughters at another dance competition. That was a trip to remember forever 😉!! Jason and I celebrated 18 years of marriage in October, And the best part of 2016?!?! I read the ENTIRE Bible in one year (although at the time of this writing, I still have one day left to read but will get that accomplished after a few hours of sleep)!! I am looking forward to doing it again in 2017 and hopefully my family will join me in doing it as well!
My cancer is staying quiet and the study drug I am on is keeping things stable and giving me an excellent quality of life. If only my sleeping would not be so elusive, but I blame the drug for that. I took up running in 2015 and continued it into 2016, I haven't ran since September but am going to pick it back up in the new year. I have lost about 44 pounds and I am almost to my weight when I got married, only about 8 more pounds to go. That is my goal for next year, lose the rest of the weight and tone up my body!
So as we say goodbye to another year and usher in a new year, may we all look to the ONE who can make all things new!! Jesus Christ!!!! He truly is the only way I can get thru some of the hard things I have been thru this year! He is my sustainer and my redeemer! He is my everything!
May 2017 be a year of blessings for each and every one of you!
In Christ's love,
Cathi
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